Saturday, October 1, 2011

Peer Pressure

I have this one friend here in Austin that somehow convinces me to do things I SO DON'T WANT TO DO.  It's like she uses car salesman tactics to guilt and convince me into doing these outings or meetups.

Weekends are kind of sacred to me.  When there is no schedule or structure to the day, it's pure bliss to me. It feels carefree and relaxed.  I think this feeling is left over from the days of me working fulltime for mr. asshole.  Most weekends we hang out in our pajamas, maybe go to jogging, have brunch, etc.  My husband had to work again today (UGH), so Mimi and I were on our own again.  My friend convinced me to go over to her house for this playdate.   I ended up having a goodtime (and Mimi as well), but I hate how she pressured me.  She never even asked me if I wanted to go, just kept sending me messages like "okay, see you on saturday" or "this is my address what time are you coming."

Now I have to head to a birthday party and Mimi never had time to nap and she's going to be a real firecracker and I dont' even have my husband to help me.  Part of me just really just wants to not go and apologize to my friend but I know she'll be disappointed if I don't go.

So off I go dragging my overtired toddler to a party where she'll no doubt be fed sugar and throw some sort of embarrassing tantrum.


Anne Prado said...

Hey, no giving in to peer pressure... Motherhood's hard enough. Just think of it like this - no one knows how YOUR day feels like, with YOUR kid, in YOUR situation. What they suggest might sound perfect in their head, but no one's really in your shoes to know. And frankly, I don't like how this friend of yours doesn't seem not to take no for an answer. She probably thinks it's ok because she loves you so much, but really, love comes with RESPECT. Meaning, you give each other breathing room to exist independently. She's probably a nice person or else you wouldn't have a good time with her, BUT that shouldn't intimidate you into being super extra nice (meaning "needy") back. Start setting boundaries now, before this nice friendship (or dependency on her part) goes out of control! It's not good for you OR for her (or even for poor little Mimi, who needs her naps). Okay, I'm off my soapbox now hehe. Just passionate about this subject 'cause I too have had to learn to say NO! And never feel guilty about it (whether the person you're saying "no" to is sane or not :).

Meghann (Bringing up Bumble) said...

our tantrums are getting harder. are yours? dealing with them somehow makes my brain and body physically ache.
on the bright side, at least you have a friend inviting you over :P

Carolin said...

Ha ha ha, well, as far as peer pressure goes, that's not too bad. It's good as long as there's no negative impact in your life, no? There's good peer pressure that can influence people to do good, or take up something active and healthy.

Carolin Newmeyer