I feel that as my husband is providing our family's income, my way of giving to the family if by keeping up our home and raising our child. I literally do everything for our home/life/finances/child, except go to my husband's job. I cook, I clean, I do laundry, I pay the bills, I take care of our rental property, the pets, our child, doctor apts, travel arrangements, taxes, I even took care of our entire move including single-handedly unpacking 150 boxes. Doing all this is MORE THAN A FULLTIME JOB.
Tonight, after we put Mimi to bed after a day or errands, I sat on the couch and turned on the laptop and began to check messages etc. The kitchen was pretty messy from last night's dinner (that I cooked) and we had been out all day since breakfast. We have our new babysitter coming tomorrow so I told him I was going to get things cleaned up I just needed to take a break for a minute. He looked the kitchen and began to huff and puff and do it himself. I just let him. Why not? I clean the kitchen 3 times a day ALL WEEK LONG. Just because he goes to a desk job all day he can't clean the kitchen once a week?
When I asked him what was wrong he told me it disgusted him that I left all those dirty dishes there since yesterday and that I didn't clean them up. I think he forgot that he ate off those dishes too. And he drank the coffees I made him etc etc etc.
It was liked he flipped a switch in me. I instantly became so angry and defensive I wanted to scream. What does he think this is I Dream of Genie? What is he? my new Devil bossman? I am going to start keeping a list of what I do all day everyday and count up the hours that I was constantly working and give it him. Like a SAHM punchcard. I knew that someday I would face the reality of how husbands take their stay at home wives for granted, but after 3 weeks? 3 weeks and he's scolding me for leaving the dishes for one day? I am mystified. I am so irritated.
I want a serious apology. Or at least a conversation about how I didn't appreciated how he came off and I want him to be truly receptive to my words, and not just appease me and give out some blanket apology so I'll "get over it." My husband isn't a jerk, but sometimes he doesn't realize how the things he says can be taken very differently than he intended.