This morning I woke up to a text message from my mother. My brother's girlfriend had her baby at 21 weeks. The baby lived for 5 minutes and died in my brother's hand. I myself felt a little overwhelmed with grief, how must they feel? To lose a baby must be one of the hardest things to have to deal with in life. I couldn't even put into words how sorry I felt for him and his girlfriend. I didn't know what to say. I told them I was so sorry for this loss and that if he needed to talk to me I was here for him.
I cried all morning, thinking how sad and angry they must feel. I cried for my poor brother, who has truly had a hard life with no breaks. I wish I could be there to console him, hug him, and tell him everything will be okay.
He stayed in the hospital with his girlfriend since Tuesday, when they had to induce her because she did not have enough amniotic fluid for the baby to survive. They told her she had to deliver the baby now or it would be stillborn. I don't really know the details, this is what my brother told my mother at 2am this morning.
I once told Franco that if something happened to Mimi I don't know if I could keep on living. I can't imagine how upset my brother must be, watching his baby die his hands. I look at Mimi watching Toy Story 3 on the couch drinking her applejuice and feel guilty. Guilty that I had a healthy baby and my poor brother has to go through this.
I hope that he and his girlfriend get through this together. I pray that his little baby boy is in heaven. I pray that they are blessed with another healthy pregnancy and baby.
I know this might seem like a weird post, but it helps me to write it out.