Friday, June 25, 2010
Getting slack for using the "cry it out" method
I just watched a mom's vlog where she describes how "crying it out wasn't for her" and how "she just wouldn't do it"
Sometimes when you give an opinion, your tone sends the real message of how you feel about something, no matter how many times you say "If it works for you that's fine...." which is like saying "I don't mean to be rude but...."
I think the quote that got me was:
".....I feel like if a baby is crying, it is crying for reason, they want their mother or father, or comfort or need to feel secure"
Okay, so how about a baby manipulating you to get what it wants? Like a kid who cried until they get their way. Is it right to make your child completely dependent on you for comfort? What about self soothing and building independence. How long to you cater to this behavior? I babysat for a family with a 3 year old who couldn't sleep without someone in a bed with her. As soon as you tried to sneak out after she fell asleep she would instantly wake up and start screaming. She got this way because her parents slept with her since she was little and was completely dependent on them for comfort all night long. You're telling me that this is a healthy behavior?
I love my child more than anything-literally. I think that I did a good thing by helping Mimi get accustomed to sleeping on her own. She sleeps so much more soundly in her crib by herself. We put her to bed awake and she rolls over and just babbles to herself before going to sleep, or she just goes to sleep.
This being said, I dont' believe on using the "crying it out method" before 5 months. Before 5 months children don't have the ability to self-soothe, so letting them cry (and I mean cry themselves to sleep not just fuss for 5 minutes) could be really upsetting for a baby.
Hey there moms--when you give an opinion on "crying it out" try not to make us feel like horrible mothers because we let our kids cry themselves to sleep for a night or two. I'll try not to make you feel like a horrible mom for screwing up your kids sleeping habits for life.