Leggings as Pants

Today I had to restrain myself from dropping Mimi off at Preschool in leggings, or pajamas pants.  Both I feel can be equally inappropriate for such occasions.  I love leggings, but very few of us can pull of "leggings as pants."  Some of you lucky ladies have the butt and legs to do it, this lady does not....

I really want to find more maternity tunic tops that cover my butt but allow me to wear leggings.  I"m seriously feeling like a house these days, and maternity jeans are just not comfortable to me this time around.  First off, when I got pregnant I was a size 12, so most of maternity jeans (Gap brand) are 12's. Well, what fit up to 5 months pregnant, does not fit anymore.  Well, they "fit" as in they go over my large ass robust figure, but I feel really uncomfortable.   I ordered another pair size 14 (gasp, it hurt my feelings to do it...) and they're too long and need to be hemmed, so I haven't worn them yet.  But to be perfectly honest, trying them on even after washing them, I wasn't as impressed as I am with leggings.  Maybe I'll just live in yoga pants the rest of this pregnancy, the perfect twist of pajamas and pants.

I am also restraining myself from cleaning and/or sleeping while Mimi is at preschool today.  I put her in Mother's Day Out/Preschool two 1/2 days a week to have time to finish writing my dissertation.  Some days I feel awesome, I can sit at my computer and crank out the work, but today I feel as though I have no writin' mojo.  I desperately want to put fresh sheets on my bed and crawl in it and set an alarm for lunchtime.  God, I hate this feeling.  I know I'm pregnant and I need rest blah blah blah, but these days I seriously feel unbelievably drained.

Please send some mojo my way....

Rainy Texas Weekend

Holy rain Batman.  In the entire first year we lived here in Austin I think it sprinkled 2 or 3 times--for less than 10 minutes, no joke.  It has been non-stop rain since Thursday night and we are LOVING it.  Is it sad when you're blessed with such hot sunny weather so consistently that you celebrate overcast rainy days like it's Christmas?  We shut off the AC, opened the windows, welcomed the humidity and snuggled all weekend.

Friday night I had a girl's night over at my friends house.  We all agreed to wear pajama pants, which made this pregnant lady pretty happy.  We ate dip and chatted until 1:30am, which is late for me.  I spent a large chunk of Saturday afternoon napping on the couch recovering from staying up past my usual bedtime of 11:30.  The rest of Saturday was kind of a blur.  I remember going out for coffee and coming home afterwards with a pretty wicked headache and nausea (thank you pregnancy hormones) and ended up watching Vanilla Sky on my Iphone in the bathtub.  Exciting right?

Today is my "work" day, where my husband and Mimi go off on an adventure from 10-1 and then I work during that time and her nap.  I was amazed at the work I was able to get done today.  Last night I went to bed with a positive attitude towards spending Sunday at the computer.  I find that is I psyche myself up like that, it really isn't' that bad.

I had been craving spaghetti, but with my husband's gluten allergy and our low-carb lifestyle, we don't eat pasta anymore.  Luckily I've found a brand of gluten free (and corn-free) pasta that doesn't taste like crap.  I whipped up some sauce during Mimi's nap with fresh basil, carrots, onion, garlic, tomatos, and mushrooms and we feasted on gluten free (yet not low-carb) brown rice pasta piled high with freshly grated parmesan.  It really was a treat!

I hit the grocery store after dinner in an outfit that would appall my friend Kim, the friend who actually tells you when you look in appropriate.  I squished my pregnant tree-trunk legs into some gray leggings with a maternity shirt and cardigan and drove my fat pregnant but to HEB.  Is it sad that going to the grocery store alone (sans toddler and annoying husband who gives me the evil eye for buying granola) is like a mini vacation at a spa? I roamed the aisles putting things in my cart that would get me the stink eye from my husband, like spiced cider and pudding cups for Mimi's lunch.

Now it's time for a new week to start.  I am 26 weeks pregnant tomorrow.  Whoa.  This whole birth of our next baby thing is really creeping up on me! I kind of want things to slow down a little.

Here's some photos of Mimi hanging out in her Pjs Saturday morning, it's all I got! I need to get my camera out more....

 

Is it tacky?

I avoided doing this for months...literally.  For some reason it felt awkward sharing about this pregnancy on facebook.  It almost felt tacky.  Here on my blog, only a few of my followers know me in real life, so sharing with you guys has been effortless and fun.  I think that I put it off for so long because I knew I'd get comments like "wow, what about your dissertation?!" that would painfully remind me of the weight I carry on my shoulders to finish writing before baby #2 comes, because I'd have even less time and energy.

I need to point out that we planned for, wanted, and are excited for this baby.  Not wanting to share the news was in my mind I guess a way to avoid the guilt I felt when people did bring up my dissertation, because I am angry and frustrated that I haven't finished writing.

Today when I dropped off Mimi at Mother's Day Out/Preschool, I mentioned to the lady about the baby coming in December and she looked straight at me and was shocked I was pregnant.  I was like Whoa lady, do you not see my giant belly? I'm 6 months along now!  Then I thought, sh*t people just think I've packed on the pounds I guess.  Maybe I should tell people instead of letting them wonder if it's too many snowcones or a baby.

I was talking to my dear friend Emily about not "sharing the news" and she said to not care about the comments of others, or what they think.  She said not to let them steal my joy over this pregnancy.  My husband and I (and Mimi) are excited about our Christmas baby coming soon.  No my facebook world can be excited for us too I guess.  One nasty dissertation comment and they're blocked though!

Baby at 24 weeks 3 days, measuring in at 1 lb 9oz

Confessions

I'm not the best at following all these pregnancy "rules."

Confession 1.  I'm laying on my bed, on my belly, typing this blog.  What?! Almost 23 weeks pregnant with a uterus the size of a cantaloup (or bigger) and I still lay on my belly sometimes? Yup.  Gummy bear doesn't like it, Gummy squirms a lot. ]

Confession 2.  I ate raw sushi tonight. What!? Yup. It was delicious too.  I think if you eat sushi from a reputable place, raw or cooked, your risk of parasite and bacterial infection is the same pregnant or not.  Trust me.  I'm a fisheries biologist.  Go ahead, argue with me.  While we're on this subject, I eat my yokes runny, my lunchmeat cold, and I think I even ate some brie this pregnancy, let's throw in some feta for good measure....I have women who stuff their face with processed carbs, genetically modified foods and sugar and point a finger at me for eating sushi and runny eggs.  This makes no sense to me.

Confession 3.  I don't want to gain weight, and actually get disappointed when I do.  My fetal maternal specialist actually said to me at my last apt that as long as the baby measures fine (which Gummy is in the 68th percentile at 20 weeks) I could gain nothing and still have a healthy baby and he wasn't worried.  So to those friends who lecture me when I say i'm happy i've only gained 7 lbs in 22 1/2 weeks, call my doctor.  I assure you he knows what's he's talking about.  I'm not a preggorexic or anything, I just know that because I started off this pregnancy at the heavier end of my suggested weight, I dont' need to pack on 35 lbs.

Confession 4.  I don't tell people i'm pregnant because I dont' want to talk about it.  I'm not hiding it, but I don't advertise it.  No facebook updates, no formal announcement, nothing.  If you see me and you say "gee are you pregnant" I'll gladly say "why yes I am."  This is weird because with Mimi's pregnancy I would shout it from the rooftop if someone let me.  If you showed the slightest interest in talking about it, I'd talk you ear off about it.  This time I just feel way more quiet and private.  Like this is something for me, my husband, and Mimi.

Ok, there, now that I have that off my chest, I'm going to go eat some watermelon.

Finished Year 3

The other night I finished Mimi's 3 year photo book.  I have used IPhoto each year to make hardbound photobooks for her to look back on (and me too) as she gets older.  I wished my parents had kept better photo books of me as a child, although I guess with most photography being digital, it is easier and less expensive these days to create photo books.

As I "flipped" through the pages (it's still in digital form), I shed a few tears.  Maybe hormones, maybe sadness as my "baby" has grown up so quickly.  I feel so blessed everyday that we chose for me to be a stay at home mom.  It's such a privilege to watch her grow everyday.  I never take it for granted.

Today Mimi and I unwrapped her old bouncer and infant carseat from plastic we sealed them in for "baby 2."  I watched her strap her baby dolls in the seats and my heart began to melt at the thought of her being a big sister in a few short months.

I'll leave you with a few photos from the end of her book...her third birthday party.

Dreamt of Running

I've been having some pretty "real" feeling dreams lately.   I'm not sure if it's pregnancy craziness or just the fact that my sleep is constantly interrupted by tossing, turning, peeing, blowing my nose, getting water, etc.

Last night I dreamt of running.  I think I actually ran a 5K in my dreams.  I can remember the terrain of the run, the cool breeze in my face (obviously I wasn't home in TX in my dream)....I could even remember the clothes I had on.  I didn't look like a husky pregnant lady in my dream.  I felt awesome.  Then I woke up, rolled over the heavy belly and remembered I'm pregnant and had to quit running at 9 weeks along.

I don't think I could run now if I was being chased by a rabid dog.  I feel so run down, queasy, and just heavy almost everyday.  My legs and feet have begun to swell (already) at only 21 weeks along.  Now I shouldn't feel too terribly heavy, I've only gained 3 lbs! One of those pounds in the baby, and god knows there's at least another two in my boobs!  Not to mention the extra blood volume, fluids, etc.  So I shouldn't feel so husky right?

I'm really having one of those weeks where I just don't feel comfortable in my body.  I am excited about this baby.  I am feeling happy and blessed to be pregnant, I just yearn to have my happy, active life back.  I want to wake up feeling refreshed, satisfied when I eat (not sick feeling), and run with the cool breeze hot Texas air in my face.

I'm due to have this baby mid December, so hopefully by the beginning of March I'll be back on the road in my Asics feeling like my old self again (but with two sports bras probably).

Here I am in the last 5K I ran, well correction, I ran one when I was 7 weeks pregnant, but this was the last one I ran when I was really rockin' the running.  Can you believe this girl used to be 250 lbs!?

Home Again

After 3 1/2 weeks away from home, we are back.  We got back late Wednesday night, well technically Thursday morning as JetBlue lost our carseat so we had to wait around until 1am to get a loaner until they found ours the next day....anyway....

It feels AMAZING to be home.  Don't get me wrong, it felt right to take time to help my mom, I enjoyed the pleasant cool weather of upstate NY, but there's nothing like coming home.  Home to a place we only moved into a week before I left!

My husband of course lived like a bachelor while I was away. There was sausage and beer in the fridge, dingy sheets he was too lazy to change (gross) and we won't even talk about the bathrooms.  After two days of cleaning, we were back in business.

Friday we had Mimi's birthday party with her little friends at a local bounce house place and my dear friend Courtney drove up for the night and helped me out bigtime.  The party was a success, despite rude people who RSVPed "not attending" the morning of (how horribly inconsiderate).  I was a little frazzled, I even forgot my camera, but luckily Courtney had hers so the occasion will not be lost in Mimi's photobook this year!

We're all just relaxing this weekend after a month of being apart as a family.  My husband fixed Mimi's trike and my jog stroller, and I tidied the garage and we're all just bumming around in the AC now.  I have this crazy overwhelming urge to organize stuff....

Lord help me it is hot in Texas.  I dont' know if it makes me especially miserable because I just spent a month is cool Upstate NY, or because I'm 20 weeks pregnant and a human furnace.  Either way, I am crabby outside in this heat!

Pregnancy wise, I'm only up 3 lbs so far this pregnancy, but you wouldn't have guessed that by the belly! (see photo at left!) I'm feeling tired, but otherwise pretty good.  Monday morning I have my 20 week "big" anatomy scan, where we'll try not to find out with baby #2 is.  If it's a boy, I imagine in the hour long ultrasound, at some point he will show the goods and we might see...we'll see what  happens!

Alas, some photos of our trip for you...